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Archive for the ‘Workin’ It’ Category

Stop Outlier-ing My Thigh

I got on the most crowded metro train I’ve been on yet (no big feat considering how rarely I am commuting during non-off hours). No one could read the things they had brought because there was barely even room to lift your arms to hold on to the rails.

The doors keep being unable to close. We get ‘announced’ at by the conductor. I feel like I am in grade school, but with less room and less of a future. A man in our car next to the door says something or other that signals to all the riders within earshot both (i) his solidarity in our desperation and frustration and (ii) that he is not the one stopping us from leaving the platform. Finally, doors close. I let out an overly young-sounding “yay!”, but life is for the living, eh? And rush hour home is for letting your mind rest a bit.

The man standing directly (verydirectly, spacepurposelyleftout) behind me makes some small talk. Little-girl-voice “yay”s may be a signal to others that you are an okay person to stranger-talk to. This is a guess. I am normally okay with stranger-talking, but it is to awkward in a city like this, in a situation like that, to encourage real conversation.

He was carrying Gladwell’s “Outliers”, which had spent the past ten minutes stuck in my thigh, despite our best efforts. I finally scored a seat. Before he got off at his stop, there was clearly awkward, do we say ‘goodbye’ attempts at eye contact possibly but maybe not and so look a little to the side but still in the general area aaaaand you know how it goes. I think it ended with someone walking through the line of sight when it might have happened.

Anyway, I will never be able to read that book without remembering this.

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“I promised you 25% of the profit after expenses.”

Obviously after expenses, Star Trek character – that’s how you know you’ve arrived at PROFIT.

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